9 Essentials for New Moms – What’s Saving My Life Right Now

My little guy turned six months old this past week. As a new mom, I can’t profess to be an expert on motherhood. I wish I could tell you all the tips and tricks for staying productive as a mom, keeping your house spotless, getting enough sleep, or making time for your hobbies. Unfortunately, I’m just not there yet.

That has been one of the hardest parts of being a new mom for me: not being an expert. It reminds me a lot of my first year teaching. I knew I wasn’t doing as good a job as other more experienced teachers; my classroom was chaotic, and I was working late every day trying to figure out how to make it work. My mornings were anxiety-ridden as I considered all the things that could go wrong each day. I felt unworthy and unprepared. I was not as good as I wanted to be, and I literally could not become as good as I wanted to be because I didn’t have the experience.

I had no idea at the time how much that stressful first year in Teach For America was preparing me for motherhood. But there are so many similarities. I am not an expert, I’m sleep-deprived, and every day is full of new challenges I have never encountered before. As a mom, I like to be good at things. Most people do, I guess. And motherhood is hard because I’m still learning.

But the thing is I was the best teacher for my students that first year because there was no one else to do the job I was doing. And that’s also true about being a mom. I am my son’s mother. I’m the only mom he has. And even if I’m not an expert, I’m the best mom I can be just by showing up for him every day.

So, while I’m still figuring it out, here are 9 essentials that have made my journey as a new mom a little easier over the past six months.

1. Getting ready every day

This is something I’ve prioritized rigidly for the past several years—since the pandemic actually—and it was a little difficult at first to integrate it into my motherhood journey, but I’ve found some semblance of a rhythm at this point. Every morning, I brush my teeth, shower, do my hair, put on makeup and jewelry, pick out a full outfit, and spritz myself with perfume. Even if I don’t plan on going anywhere all day. And when I say “every morning,” it might not be the first thing in the morning. But at some point in the first half of the day, I make an effort to do all those things. “Getting ready” looks different to everyone in different seasons. Right after Luke was born, I did a lot less than I do now. But the key point is I do what makes me feel put together, and I do it every day.

2. The Lovevery Play Gym

The Lovevery Play Gym is one of our most-used baby products, and I’m putting it on here because it’s helped me reclaim so much of my autonomy as a new mom while also giving my little guy the chance to have fun and do something that’s good for him (tummy time). In the morning, I put Luke on here with a variety of toys so I can do a workout. I put him on here when I wash dishes, when I cook, when I write blog posts like this one! There’s only so much we can get done while our little ones sleep, and it’s so helpful to have a safe place for them to play. He wasn’t able to use the mat right away, but at this point, he can enjoy it for 30-40 minute stretches, and it has truly been one of the biggest blessings in my life.

3. YouTube Workouts

I have two primary forms of exercise: running and pilates. Before my son was born, my husband and I ran a few 10Ks together, and I hope one day to be able to run a half-marathon with him—he did his first this June in Texas heat!! But running has been a bit of a struggle lately with Luke. I hope eventually to reintegrate it into my routine, but for now, I’m doing mostly just pilates.

Right after Luke was born, I used Pregnancy & Postpartum TV’s workouts. I particularly like this playlist because the videos are about 10 minutes long. I did these exercises every day for a few weeks when I was trying to make fitness a regular part of my life again. Once my abs were healed enough, I transitioned over to Move with Nicole’s pilates workouts. I don’t do yoga for personal reasons, but I love her pilates and dancer workouts. Finally, Fit with Sally has an amazing baby weight workout I do whenever Luke is especially needy in the morning. At this point, I exercise 3-4 times a week, and it’s been truly amazing to feel like I’m taking control of my fitness again. Oh! And YouTube is FREE!

4. To-Do Lists

When I was a teacher, to-do lists were my bread and butter, and the same is true as a new mom. I have a to-do list for every day of the week, and every teeny task I hope to accomplish is on there. My to-do lists all contain:

• Make bed
• Exercise
• Shower & get ready
• 1 load laundry
• Unload dishwasher

On Mondays, I get groceries. Tuesdays and Thursdays are for cleaning. Wednesdays and Fridays are for writing. It’s a work in progress, and I tweak it every day, but there is something so satisfying about checking things off a list, even if I can’t get to everything. If you’re looking for a great to-do list app, I love Google Keep and have been using it for the past four years.

5. Homemade Lattes

My husband and I are coffee connoisseurs. One of our favorite activities on a weekend or when we’re in a new place is to stop by a local coffee shop for a latte. My husband prefers his hot, and I like mine iced. But this can get a little pricy. So we try to make our own most of the time. One of our most-used wedding presents is our Breville espresso machine. I also highly recommend Nespresso’s Vertuo machine, which my husband has had since college. No matter how tough my day is, I always look forward to a homemade iced latte in the afternoon. I’ve even been experimenting with making different syrups! My current favorite is pistachio.

6. Grocery shopping

I have a friend who’s always told me she loves grocery shopping. For a long time, I didn’t understand that because groceries were just another thing I had to do on the weekends. But now it’s one of Luke and I’s weekly adventures, and I’ve really started to look forward to it. I use HEB Curbside for all our essentials and then get milk and a few fun products at Whole Foods. I’ve also become a huge fan of Trader Joe’s. At some point, I’ll have to write posts about my favorite things from those two grocery stores. Variety is the spice of life, and it might take longer to visit so many different places, but I enjoy it so much more.

7. Libby

I love reading but felt like I never had time after my son was born. Not to mention, we didn’t have any books in the apartment that I was particularly craving to read. One of my good friends introduced me to Libby, which is an app that lets you check out eBooks from your local library for FREE! My system at this point is to just get on the waitlist for any book I want to read and then read whatever’s available first. It’s not as good as physical paper books, but if the options are reading eBooks or not reading at all, I choose eBooks. At this point, I read them on my phone and iPad, which isn’t the greatest for my eyes. But this is even better if you have a Kindle or ReMarkable tablet without backlighting.

8. Community

Being a new mom is hard, and I am so blessed with the support system my husband and I have. From my parents to his parents to all our friends, we could not do it without them. Right after Luke was born, my parents stayed with us for a while, followed by my husband’s parents. We had friends stopping by multiple times a week that first month with food for our Meal Train. And now that Luke is older, we have friends and family members who will lovingly watch Luke for us if we need it. It takes a village. I’ve also been trying to build community with other moms because my husband and I are the first of our circle to have a baby. I joined my first moms group and I’m hoping that will yield fruits in the future as well.

9. The Sunday Obligation

This blog is not solely intended for Christians, but it would be inauthentic of me not to mention one of the biggest things that gives my life meaning and structure. I am a practicing Catholic, and at the end of a long week, I love having the opportunity to spend time at Mass and receive the Eucharist. This is the true food of my soul. I take my concerns, my worries, my frustrations, and lay them down before the cross of Jesus Christ. I don’t have a lot of good spiritual routines going at this point besides Sunday church. And my husband and I actually go to two services every Sunday because while I’m a Catholic, he’s a Protestant. The sermons at the Protestant church we attend are fantastic and thought-provoking as well. But at the end of the day, I love getting to just sit in the presence of the Lord. If you aren’t a Christian, this isn’t meant to offend you. But there’s nothing that can save my life quite like Jesus Christ.

So there you have it! 9 essentials that are saving my life as a new mom. Whether you’re a new mom, an experienced mom, in college, or just a working girly trying to figure things out, I hope these things can give you some inspiration and maybe also inspire you to reflect on what’s saving your life! I’d love to hear about it in the comments below!

Verily, Kyrie